Tallwhacker Ceiling

Like Michaelangelo before him, this tortured nob artist took his work to the ceiling. Sprawling across a full panel of the wooden Ravenscourt park alcove, this work tells a chilling story of lies, betrayal and broken hearts. The headline “GULLIBLE” stands stark against the damp veined wood, while “FUCK U Alisha G bitch” adds some context to the anguish. Could Alisha be a latter day Helen of Troy?

Honing in on the detail of the illustration, this nob has been captured in angry inaccuracy using firm brush strokes. The left bollock is bizarrely distended, ballooning forth at an outlandish angle. The pubes are surprising bountiful, lending an almost Seurat-esque quality to the piece. And just discernable at the tip is little trickle of nob juice.

Alisha - the sadness you have caused has not gone in vain… another artist is born!

Gno(b)mon

A fantastic example of rare council-funded nob-sculpture which also doubles up as a sundial! Lucky Brighton residents!

This picture was tweeted @NobwatchUK by @windust - nice work @windust! The Nobservatory salutes you!

ReadybrekNob

A lovely little flaccid nob to fill you with wamth this chilly Tuesday morning! The Nobartist has carefully arranged the pubes like rays of light and warmth emitting from the goolies - just like the warmth you get from a big bowl of porridge, but lower down - like having two little hot water bottles for your trouser pet.

Straw Pole 3

Is there no bounds to these Nobartists imaginations???

Yet another straw pole nob! This one displays both astounding attention to detail, considering the difficulty the nobartists must have in manipulating their chosen medium, and off-the-wall shapings. Pointedly erect (the nob is only viewable from above at certain angles which would indicate the intention was for it not to appear flaccid) the nob has a series of lines along its shaft, could these pertain to a saggy foreskin? Or a ribbed condom? Maybe a new and interestingly depicted STD?

The nuts are where the nobartists have let themselves down slightly, clearly less attention has been paid to the construction of them, with one bollock well formed but barely attached and the other outsized and flabby  - we like the meat, but we'll pass on the veg.

Conglomernob

A rather unexpected find for our Field Researcher. Barely visible to the naked eye, this tiny todger makes up in skill what it lacks in size. Comparable to the exquisite miniatures of the Ottoman Empire, this lilliputian love-sausage demonstrates the skill of the nobartist in not only the incredible detail of the dong, but the careful way that its rocks are perfectly integrated into and camouflaged by the... er... rocks.

Straw Pole 2

The return of the Straw Pole! These Nobartists are taking full advantage of what now appears to have been set up as a playful socially interactive 3D installation JUST FOR THEM!

Real investment in people.